We all have people in our lives where we can only do certain things with them; for example, you only sit around awkwardly when grandma is in town, and you don’t go out clubbing with your step-mom. The world just doesn’t work that way, and it’s important to know the boundaries of your fuck buddy relationships.
But what about fuck buddies? What are the relationship guidelines for that?
Just like with grandma, there are far more things you can’t do together than you can do together. Your friend with benefits may seem like a totally chill person you could hangout with, but that’s a big no-no.
There are actually quite a few things that you can’t do with your f buddy, of which seven are listed below. Check them out, and make sure you don’t recreate these mistakes!
- Post-romp Meal After sex, you may feel like chowing down on a massive burrito or getting a couple juicy burgers. That’s fine, but I highly recommend you don’t eat with your f buddy; eating together is something you do when you’re dating, but you don’t want your FWB setup to resemble a legit relationship in any way.
When you grab some food together, it’s almost like you’re on a date, and your fuck buddy isn’t going to want any part of that; if they wanted to go on a date, they’d ask you out. They didn’t do that, so just have tons of sex with them until you eventually part ways, sharing awkward greetings every once in a while.
While you may be hungry after sex, wait till they leave before you grab something to eat.
- No Gifts! When you’re dating someone, you should get them something nice every now and then to show your appreciation, or just ‘cuz you wanted to. It’s important to remember bae’s birthday and other important dates, but when it comes to your f buddy, you don’t need to know a damn thing about them.
You’re having sex with each other on a consistent basis – that’s the only gift you need to give. There’s no need to memorize their birthday or keep tabs on how long you’ve been sleeping together; if you want to do that, start dating!
- Don’t Hangout Don’t. At all. I mean it.
This person you started hooking up with a while back isn’t going to wonder why you’re only having sex with them; they know very well the nature of your relationship together. He or she only hit you up when they want a lil’ somethin’-somethin’, so you should know by now that hanging out with your FWB is only going to ruin the great setup you’ve got going.
If your buddy bailed on a concert you bought tickets to, don’t reach for your phone to text your f buddy; it may seem like a normal thing to do, but when she/he reads a text from you asking them out on what appears to be a date, they will get confused and might think that you want something more, which isn’t what they want. Ask another friend to go with you or sell the ticket, but definitely don’t ask your friend with benefits to chill if you’re not gonna “Netflix & Chill”.
- No Talking Obviously, communication is key when you’re with your f buddy, but it’s easy to forget that they are not your boyfriend or girlfriend and start venting about your life. This person sees you naked all the time, which is something that bae gets to do, only they aren’t bae.
The intimacy you get with a fuck buddy may remind you of past relationships, so it’s understandable that people may lose sight of the status of the relationship and start to talk about their life or wonder what’s going on in yours. When your FWB plops down on your bed and starts to talk about their day rather than tearing off their clothes, they’ve broken a pretty big rule.
It’s important to remember that your f buddy is your f buddy – nothing more, definitely nothing less. (If they know how to bring it in bed, that should be all the stress-relief you need.)
- Stay Together – Most relationships come to an end at some point, or they evolve and adapt to change. One relationship that you never want to extend is the one you have with your f buddy. Yeah, they’re hot and really good in bed, but unfortunately, you will need to leave that dreamland before long.
If you spend more than a couple months with one particular friend with benefits, you could end up getting attached, which will only hurt you when they get bored and find someone else to bring home at night. To prevent yourself from falling for your f buddy, limit the amount of time you spend together, and plan on parting ways within three months.
You may sometimes think about what it’d be like to date your fuck buddy, as they may be hot and you know that they’re good in bed, but if you fall into that trap, you’ll only end up hurt once they break things off. If you want to date someone, don’t go looking for a friend with benefits who you can turn into a legit relationship; that never ends well.
- Sexting – Sexting may be a warmup before the show, but you shouldn’t sext with your f buddy; that’s something you do when your sweetheart is out of town on business. You know very well that whenever they hit you up they want some action from you; why sext each other when you can just get straight to the point?
If you’re in a relationship, a little sexy texting here and there can help spice things up, but your FWB doesn’t need any spice when all you do together is have sex! When you’re sexting your sexy-time pal, you’re just wasting time – get at it!
- Try To Get With Their Friends. I don’t see many girls doing this, but us guys can tend to overreach a bit. When you and your f buddy finally part ways, don’t fraternize with their circle of friends or try to sleep with any of them. Why?
Well, it’s going to cause an unnecessary disturbance among their friends and it’ll make it even more awkward for you if you see your old FWB when you’ve been sleeping with their friend for the last month and a half. They’ll have dirt on you, and you don’t want to tempt them into using it to prevent you from getting any more action.
When you and your friend with great benefits decide to go separate ways, be mature about it and leave their social circle alone – there’s plenty more fish in the sea, my friend.